Positive Self Talk Your Alcoholic Can’t Touch

self_talk

I worked with a lady who had the most remarkable perspective on how to handle when others tried to put her down.

She would simply say to herself, “Just because they call me a purple polka dotted giraffe it doesn’t make me one”.

Amazing, what insight!

Even if you’re wearing a purple polka dotted turtle neck sweater with a long neck on it. Even the similarities don’t MAKE you a giraffe.

The power of self talk will change your life. I recommend this skill as one you work on until you master it.

You’ve probably heard there’s something wrong with you if you talk to yourself? Well, that only applies if you don’t know it’s you doing the talking.

Let me give you a few things to consider when you talk to yourself.

Differences make a difference

When you look at the example given above it’s easy to understand how you could be drawn into the belief you might be mistaken for the purple polka dotted giraffe, but the key here is you’re not.

How do you know? You take one part of what is said and evaluate yourself. Like this, “am I purple?” and the answer is “no”.

Check that one off. Do the same for polka dotted and then giraffe. You’ve got it!

That’s how you handle things said to you. Let’s use another example.

Your alcoholic says “you’re stupid”. Use the tool…Are you stupid. Obviously, you communicate with him, interact and make your way through this very difficult relationship.

That doesn’t qualify for ‘stupid’. So, dismiss his statement because it’s not true.

Sometimes it takes focus on the smallest difference to recognize the inaccuracy of things said to you.

This skill works when you use it. You’ll get better at using it as you go along.

Try it again and again to make it a normal process you do in your self talk.

Positive self talk

You know how easy it is to get down on yourself. Put-downs and negative comments seem to linger.

I think they are rehearsed again in an effort to understand ‘why’ they were said.

The answer is often because he was drinking.

The task is to begin to start positive self talk to improve the way you feel about you.

I’ve heard it takes as many as five positive thoughts to overtake a negative thought.

Whew! We have some work to do to catch up.

When you do something well, tell yourself about it. In fact, find out for yourself how it feels to really give yourself some kudos for a job well done.

Make this a priority. If you expect your alcoholic or those buddies of his to do much positive feedback, good luck.

You’re going to have to make the positive feedback come on your own.

Here’s one that works. Next time you get your hair done at the salon, ask the hairdresser what she thinks of the hairdo.

I’m sure she’ll give you positive feedback. Then ask a couple more in the salon. Take all you can get.

Then ask a few friends who you KNOW will give you positive feedback.

People influence you

The people you have as friends have a great impact on your self talk.

They say something and you think what did she mean by that remark.

If your friend is generally negative or extremely self centered you’re going to find it difficult to think positive thought during your time together or when you think about it later.

The goal here is to limit the negative influences and increase the positive ones in your life.

The net result will be more positive experiences when you are with them and afterwards when you think about them.

I’m so thankful to the friend who shared that just because a person calls you a purple polka dotted giraffe it doesn’t make you one.

She would simply say to herself, “Just because they call me a purple polka dotted giraffe it doesn’t make me one”.




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Here’s What 2 Other People Thought...

  1. This is an AWESOME article. Good advice, Good reminder.

    • FreeMyAddict Team

      I’m glad you enjoyed the article. It makes a world of difference when you learn to say good things to yourself.

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